Now sure, not EVERYONE hates Valentine’s Day, but the majority of the population does. I don’t blame them either. There are plenty of viable reasons to hate Valentine’s Day.
Here are a few I have compiled in the past twenty minutes:
1. Being alone on Valentine’s Day sucks. That is right. There is nothing more disheartening than being alone on a day that is dedicated to couples. I mean really, what kind of sick fuck decided to create a holiday that would alienate between one third and one half of the global population? What kind of twisted mind does it take to come up with that kind of thing?
2. Valentine’s Day has introduced the idea of forced romanticism. For those of us who tend to be naturally romantic, it has cheapened the idea. For the rest of the population, it is a day in which they are expected to act like someone they aren’t. This is just another example of our society asking people to change who they are to fit in.
3. Valentine’s Day breeds contention. If a guy isn’t romantic enough, it causes problems with his significant other. If a guy is too romantic, it can cause problems. Finally, if a guy just says, “Screw it, I am not a romantic person” and blows off Valentine’s Day, he will be lucky to survive the day. On the flip side, guys get upset because they are expected to buy expensive and extravagant gifts on this day. What is special about the day? Well, we are just told it is special, and things need to be bought.
4. It doesn’t matter how good your Valentine’s Day gift to someone is, you just have to be better next year. It is the ultimate game of one-upsmanship with oneself. If you do something amazing on your first Valentine’s Day together, every other year will just be compared to that year unfavorably.
5. Being alone on Valentine’s Day sucks. Yeah, I know I already said it, but oh well. It needs to be said more than once.
And now for fun, a Jay Leno quote:
“Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!” - Jay Leno
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