Two in one day? What?

Yeah, so this is my second post of the day, but it is just to post up the article I just wrote for the Observer.

I love writing these last minute columns, but I can never think of anything to write about. Consequently, I tend to ask for topic ideas from friends. The suggestions I get are all over the map. Here are a few of them: “Write about politics.” “Write about people going to college just so they can get more money in later jobs.” “Write about how Ninjas are better than Pirates.” “Write about how Jason Keller and George White are the sexiest men on campus.”

Now, some of these topics are completely stupid (I mean, everyone knows Pirates are better), but sometimes a topic clicks with me and I can run with it. Three people suggested various Hollywood topics to me. These ranged from Britney Spears’s recent head shaving to why Vince Vaughn was responsible for Brad Pitt and Jennifer Anniston’s divorce. After quickly dismissing these things as topics, it struck me how sad it was that Hollywood gossip was the most popular topic suggestion.

Not one person I talked to mentioned Iran, the peace summit with Israel and the Palestinian authority, the multiple outbreaks of salmonella infected foods, or the asteroid that threatens to impact with Earth in 2036 (it is true people).

No, I got suggestions regarding Anna Nicole Smith, Britney Spears, and Brad Pitt. Is this what our society has come to? Well, apparently the answer to that question is yes, because as looking at the “Most Popular” news articles on Google, I find that 6 out of the top 10 stories are about Sports or Hollywood.

What is it about Hollywood celebrities that so enthralls our culture? Is it the flashiness and glamour of their lifestyle that makes them seem more important than global politics? Is it that they make more money in one year than most families will make in a lifetime for pretending to be other people?

Here I am complaining about this phenomenon, but at the same time, I am fueling it. Earlier in this article I wrote about various things that have happened recently in Hollywood. Now, unfortunately, I think this article will spawn more conversations about them than about the truly important events in our world.

I will just leave you with this question: Do you know what brand of peanut butter has been recalled because of salmonella? If not, you may want to start looking at news stories that are a little more important than “which celebrity just had a breakdown/breakup/breaksomething”.

Heh, I rock. Also, Trips is amazing.

Cognitive Dissonance Sucks

Just a little blurb here.

Don't you just hate it when you disagree with yourself?

I mean, part of you wants to think or do one thing, and another part of you is vehemently against it. What do you listen to? Do you listen to the rational, calm, and intellectual side or do you listen to the spontaneous, heartfelt, and emotional side? How do you decide which part of yourself is in the right? Or should you just flip a coin and go with the winner?

. . . I dunno. . . I am just rambling.

One quick quote that I thought of when I was contemplating my cognitive dissonance:

If your head tells you one thing, and your heart tells you another, before you do anything, you should first decide whether you have a better head or a better heart. - Marilyn vos Savant

C’est mon vie

Ok, I originally wrote up a post with this basic topic on Wednesday night/Thursday morning, but for some reason it didn’t post on my blog like it should have. I haven’t been in a blogging mood the past couple days, so I waited till now to write it up again.

Hindsight - recognition of the realities, possibilities, or requirements of a situation, event, decision etc., after its occurrence

Yeah. As I said in a post back in June, hindsight can be a real bitch, but hindsight can also be helpful. Hindsight can cut through all the bullshit of life and let you know that you have done the right thing in certain situations.

Looking back at my life, I am glad to say that for the most part I have made the right decisions. When I was a kid, I read and learned instead of sitting around watching TV and movies 24/7 (I only spent 18/7 doing that). When I was in middle and high school I didn’t go out and get drunk every weekend like so many of my classmates did. I came to Saint Joseph’s College and made some of the best friends I have ever had.

Unfortunately, there is one area of my life in which I haven’t always made the best choices. I repeatedly make bad choices in this area, and I don’t seem to learn from my past mistakes in the slightest.

This area is of course . . . women. BJ and I were talking about our past history with women and the guy actually made a comment worthy of quoting for something other than shock value.

“If you would just stop existing, I would stop falling for you. . .”

(Ok, I added that ellipses at the end because he actually said, “If you would just stop existing, I would stop falling for you, bitch”, but then he said, “Nah, just kidding take the bitch off that.”)

But he was right, that is how I have always dealt with my feelings for women. I have always developed romantic feelings, and then when it doesn’t work out I retain the feelings. For some reason I can’t explain, I just don’t let go. I have always clung to the feelings, perhaps clinging to some vain hope that if I keep feeling that way, it will change things. I have done this for more years than I would like to remember. It is unhealthy, and now that I look back at it, I am somewhat scared by it. Why would I do such things to myself? I can’t answer that, but hopefully I will never have to again.

Now that I have said that, I can also honestly say that I am not doing it anymore. I am learning from my mistakes, and the change feels good.

Some lyrics to wrap up this post:

Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, I want to stay in love with my sorrow.

Don't want to let it lay me down this time.
Drown my will to fly.
Here in the darkness I know myself.
Can't break free until I let it go.
Let me go.

Darling, I forgive you after all.
Anything is better than to be alone.
And in the end I guess I had to fall.
Always find my place among the ashes.

I can't hold on to me,
Wonder what's wrong with me.

Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, ...stay in love with my sorrow.
I'm gonna let it go.

Ok, I lied, that isn’t the end. Just because I haven’t used it since my New Year’s post, my favorite quote:

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.” – Neil Gaiman

I’ve never been so alone. . ./She can ask for the truth. . ./Politics. . .

Ok, so this is going to be a three part post. I am not sure if any of the parts will be all that long, but oh well.

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. . . And I’ve never been so alive.

Those are lyrics from Third Eye Blind’s “Motorcycle Dive By”. Not only is that song one of my all time favorites, but right now it also fits my mood.

As the lyrics say, I’ve never been so alone. . . well I have been, hell I have lived the majority of my life as alone as I am now, but what I mean is that I am just by myself now. Lately I have been relying on others less. I have been whining about life less. I’m spending time to myself when I could be out with friends. I’m not becoming a hermit by any means, but I am just not as connected to my friends as I once was.

And funnily enough, I haven’t felt this happy and relaxed in a long time. I am finally learning how to do what is best for George. I’m stopping myself from saying/doing stupid things that feed the emotional masochist in me. I’m finally content with being single. Do I wish I wasn’t? Sure. Do I see certain people and think, “what if?” Every single day, but I don’t let it get me down. I don’t let the fact that I am alone rule my life anymore. I enjoy what I have, and I have stopped dwelling on what I don’t.

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. . . But she’ll never believe you.

Why do women not believe a single word out of a guy’s mouth? It can be about anything, and they still won’t believe.

Take this even that happened twice in the past two weeks with me -

Woman - “Is this test going to be hard?”

Me - “Not really, that professor’s test are normally pretty easy.”

Woman - “Are you sure? Should I study more than I normally do?”

Me – “No really, they tend to be really straightforward if you have read the stuff and looked at your notes.”

Woman – “But you are smart, what you think is easy is probably really hard.”

Me – “*Sigh* . . . I quit.”

What was there not to believe in that exchange? Was there some hidden message I was transmitting that made them believe I was lying to them to sabotage them? How about this conversation that I had (again twice, but about VERY different things) –

Woman – “How did I do?”

Me – “You did really well.”

Woman – “Are you just saying that?”

Me – “No, you really did a good job.”

Woman – “You are just saying that because I am your friend.”

Me – “No, really. I mean it. You did a good job. I wouldn’t lie to you about this.”

Woman – “. . . Okay.”

Me – “*Resigned sigh*”

I don’t know what it is, and maybe it is just me, but for some reason it seems that women have an underlying distrust of anything said by a man. Have we as a society so fully blackened the reputation of men that nothing they say is believable?

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This third section is only going to be a few sentences. Politics belong only in the political world. Leave them out of things involving talent and skill. . . Grah!

Now a quote and some lyrics from the two songs used as titles.

Your feelings may be as clear as traffic light signals, but what if the person watching you is color-blind? So, tell them how you feel.

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Motorcycle Drive By – Third Eye Blind

Visions of you on a motorcycle drive by,
The cigarette ash flies in your eyes, and you don’t mind, you smile,
And say the world doesn’t fit with you.
I don’t believe you, you’re so serene.
Careening through the universe, your axis on a tilt, you’re guiltless and free,
I hope you take a piece of me with you,
And there’s things Id like to do that you don’t believe in,
I would like to build something, but you’d never see it happen
And there’s this burning, like there’s always been,
I’ve never been so alone, and I’ve, I’ve never been so alive,

And there’s this burning, ah ha, there was this burning.

. . . .

I go home to the coast. It starts to rain, I paddle out on the water alone,
Taste the salt and taste the pain. I’m not thinking of you again,
Summer dies and swells rise, the sun goes down in my eyes, see this rolling wave, darkly coming to take me, home,
And I never been so alone, and I’ve never been so alive.

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She’s Always A Woman – Billy Joel

She can kill with a smile
She can wound with her eyes
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies
And she only reveals what she wants you to see
She hides like a child
But she's always a woman to me

She can lead you to love
She can take you or leave you
She can ask for the truth
But she'll never believe
And she'll take what you give her, as long as it's free
Yeah, she steals like a thief
But she's always a woman to me

CHORUS
Oh-she takes care of herself
She can wait if she wants
She's ahead of her time
Oh-and she never gives out
And she never gives in
She just changes her mind

And she'll promise you more
Than the Garden of Eden
Then she'll carelessly cut you
And laugh while you're bleedin'
But she'll bring out the best
And the worst you can be
Blame it all on yourself
Cause she's always a woman to me

CHORUS

She is frequently kind
And she's suddenly cruel
She can do as she pleases
She's nobody's fool
But she can't be convicted
She's earned her degree
And the most she will do
Is throw shadows at you
But she's always a woman to me

Snoopy is street

I just had to post this picture somewhere after I found it.